03-01-2023, 01:28 PM | #51 |
Hello.
Join Date: Mar 2004
Carmudgeonly Ride: '09 X3, '11 328xiT, '11 135i C, '17 c2, '19 X5
Location: Downingtown, PA
Posts: 5,537
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I have a bit more complex situation being divorced, but I pay for car, 'normal' maintenance and some gas. My ex pays insurance. My son pays for non-routine maintenance and some gas.
My son has almost full time access to our 2009 X3. We make it very clear it isn't his, and it is a priveledge, but as long as following rules he can use it what he wants within reason (ie:it has been "NO" when he has asked to drive him and a bunch of buddies to the beach). He's only screwed up a couple of times and lost the priveledge for a week or two since last summer. He plays sports pretty much year round, and splits his time 50/50 between his mom's and my house which is 25 miles away so an after school job is a tough thing for him to do (partly selfishly, I don't want to lose custody time with him and don't want him having to drive to my house at 9pm at night, just to head back to school at 6:30am the next day). He is learning to be handy with the car. He hit a parking pole a few months ago and damaged the front fender. We went together to a junk yard, picked a ~same~ color fender off another e83 and pulled the damage one off / replaced with the new one for $130 of his christmas / work money. Same thing when one of his friends broke the cup holder the other day. I got 2 hours of yardwork for a $40 ebay cupholder replacement. It's not a lot, but at least it gives him some skin in the game.
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Josh (PA) - '19 X5 '17 991.2 C2 Cab '11 135i Convertible '11 328xiT '09 X3 Last edited by Josh (PA); 03-01-2023 at 01:58 PM. |
03-01-2023, 01:53 PM | #52 |
195
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 24,632
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We do a gas stipend that’s enough to cover back and forth to school; she has to buy the gas for the car, so if she spends more than we give her it comes out of her job money (mostly tutoring these days).
Partly this is an acknowledgment that her driving to school is a convenience for us as much as it is for her; we’ve really been able to cut down on a lot of back and forth we were otherwise doing. |
03-01-2023, 02:02 PM | #53 |
Old Fart
Join Date: Oct 2005
Carmudgeonly Ride: T4R,GTI
Location: San Diego
Posts: 8,576
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Thanks for all the replies. Sounds like car and insurance is paid by parents with them pitching in a bit on gas/repairs they do is the consensus.
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03-01-2023, 03:08 PM | #54 |
195
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 24,632
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With used car prices what they are, it was really hard for me to justify insisting that she pay for her own car; anything she would have realistically been able to afford would be quite old, high mileage, and prone to breakdowns.
It’s a position of remarkable privilege to be able to get a newer car that she can drive, and I don’t have a great answer for whether it’s making things too easy for her. It’s something I worry about, but not enough to make her drive a $2000 car every day. |
03-01-2023, 04:21 PM | #55 | |
Carmudgeon
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,253
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Kars for Kids
Quote:
Makes sense. I plan to do the same thing for my kid to when he’s of age ensure he’s driving as new as possible with the latest safety features. Even now my wife and I always worry about whether we are doing too much for him - guess it’s one of many things to worry about as a parent Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
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03-01-2023, 04:49 PM | #56 |
Solving problems
Join Date: Oct 2003
Carmudgeonly Ride: M5 / 718 GTS / Cooper S / GTI / LR4
Location: Metro Boston
Posts: 25,279
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03-01-2023, 09:38 PM | #57 |
Carmudgeon
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 4,679
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I pay for everything, the cars, maintenance, insurance, gas etc. … my son was a pain in the ass who would do stupid things as a teen and would lose his car here and there when I thought he got out of hand, he is older now and whatever I did worked because he turned out well. Both my daughters are great so no issues there.
My feeling is they have their whole life to work and pay for things … i’ll handle it while they are young. Yeah different from most parents thinking … |
08-08-2023, 12:24 PM | #58 |
Old Fart
Join Date: Oct 2005
Carmudgeonly Ride: T4R,GTI
Location: San Diego
Posts: 8,576
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My older son who is 17 finally got around to getting his permit. This past weekend he drove us to the Eastern sierra's go camping, ~6 hours. Pretty nice sitting as the passenger instead of the usual driver
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08-08-2023, 12:28 PM | #59 |
dogged
Join Date: Dec 2003
Carmudgeonly Ride: '22 M440 xDrive GC
Posts: 13,342
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08-08-2023, 12:32 PM | #60 |
Old Fart
Join Date: Oct 2005
Carmudgeonly Ride: T4R,GTI
Location: San Diego
Posts: 8,576
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