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As you all know better than me, the e46 has many advantages... Curvy design, room for a spare, lighter weight...
The e90 does have a big one. Solidity. I was rear-ended - quite heavily - back in 08 in a 06 330xi. The car took it like a champ. I had had a 330Ci and a 330i sedan zhp by that point. While the e46 sedan was marginally stiffer framed than the coupe, neither come close to the e90. This goes for my later e46 m3 as well. When you enter a steep garage ramp at angle, so as to not scrape, you feel the 'twist' in the machine and the e90 was better at that. Just felt more one piece.
I replaced my 330xi with a 330i, both 06 n52's, 255hp. In that trim (and between 07 to end of 09), I did not find the engine lacking. Smooth and easily 85mph+ on the highway for long stretches. I preferred it to the m54, more economical. I wasn't worried about reliability so cannot comment on that. I later had a 335xi and I liked that car too, one of the ones I wish I had not sold. I got angry at it when it got stuck on an ice pile (while wearing winters) and replaced with the b8.5 s4.
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